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The Catch of the Season. By CECILY ALLEN. Copyright, 1017, by 11. C' Yarcells. "Wint, if you don't sit down a quiet you'll be overboard in a m I've warned you two or three now, and I'm through." "Talk about being quiet," said "You have clacked incessantly, 1 sitting hen, ever since I threw my line. No wonder we don't get a b \Vint Miller turned around to to his friend ,lack Barnes, lighting ' pipe meanwhile. "All right, you clumsy old thin know what i'nt talking about," grl Jack. "You mute about in this row -boat as if it was an ocean g steamer. Look to your line there Wint turned suddenly at the met of the long awaited bite. Plums might be, but lack lined his chum because he was clumsy and alw needed his help.' The turn was f Wint lost his balance, his foot slit on the wet bottom of the boat, backward he trent for a cold and expected dip. Fortunately the w was only five feet deep, and W head appeared above the water i second. pipe in mouth and the tire going. "Curses on you, Jack Barnes! did that purposely. and you'll pay this," gWrowled int as he tried climb aboard. Jack's convulsions of laughter not help matters much, and when did stop for a moment it was only heap coals of tire upon 1Yiut's head. "My fault! Well. I like that, - old landlubber. I told you to k quiet, but you knew it all. Now day's fishing is spoiled, and I can s home aril nurse you. Climb *bot and let's get home before you dere the measles or whooping , ough." It was a very sullen pair that locked the door of their fishing lint hour later. taint was shivering, a Jack was muttering under his brea They hunted in vain for dry clothes, they hard come down only fur a day two to rough it. Jack turned to I friend with a helpless expression. "Wint, there's only one thing to d We'll have to pack up and go over Uncle 1fill's and sec if they will to you in. You're sneezing your heal o now, and by morning you'll probab have a nue ease of pneumonia. I ha to do i1, for Aunt Fanny doesn't a prove of 010 or m' friends either f that matter." added Jack. Again the pair started ori and tval ed through the woods to a pretty litt cottage set in among the pines. AuFanny Beal suet theta fist the pore She was a woman who 1101d her Lea high at all times, but just now — seemed to be straighter than ever. "So it's you. is it?" she said as Jac extended his hand. "Who is this pe son with you?" she added as sh glanced at the figure of Wint, covere with red stud and hatless. "Oh. I say. Aunt fanny, be eas We've hadan arrident. This is m best fours,!• Mr. Winthrop Miller. II fell overboard, and we've come o00 to see if you wou't take us in for th night u£ttil his clothes get dry Where's Uncle Will? he'll under- stand." "Four uncle is iu town, and Belle and I are alone. Blood is blood, and you cannot ,levy your own. I'll take you in for your mother's 05110.'' whined Aunt F:tttny as she opened the door in anything but a welcome manner. "Never mind about Inc. Aunt Fan- ny•" cheerily answered Jack as he saw the door open for them. 'But Wint must get tiry. He's caught a dreadful col(!, I fear." "He doesn't look exactly frail," sug- gested Mrs. Beal as she glanced at Wlnt's somewhat ample proportions. "However. c._nne in and go up to your uncle's room. I suppose you will leave this evening. You knots we have no spare room." she added lest they should avail themselves of a night's lodging. Wint did not leave that evening nor for many, many evenings thereafter. At 5 o'clock that afternoon the doctor was sent for. He looke4.tt the flush- ed cheeks and the parched tongue. He listened to the wheezing breath as it came so hard and shook his head', "We must have a nurse at once. Mrs. Beal. The man Is very sick. He must have care or he will die. I will send a nurse and will call again later. Good afternoon," and the doctor was gone. For weeks Wint hovered between life and the great beyond. No one en- tered the room but the nurse, the. doc- tor and Isabelle Ileal, Jack's cousin. She relieved t nurse, and sometimes even the doctor would call her in to give a few directions. Jack cattledown every day or jwo, but never was allowed to see his chum. Slowly the big man made his light, slowly his eyes lost the glassy look, and finally —the day came when the nurse was no longerVneeded. Isabelle could manage with Jack's help at night. "I say, nurse," said Wint one day as Isabelle sat reading to him, "I'm glad that other nurse beat it. I like you better." "But you know I'm not really a nurse at all, Mr. Miller," said Isabelle as she blushed at the inferred compli- ment. "I'nt Jack's cousin—Aunt Fan. ny's daughter, you understand. But I love Jack, and I'll do anything for his friends," and she began to read again. "Don't let's read any more," said Wint. "Just let's talk. I don't care whether you're a really truly nurse or not. I—I like you 'cause you're you, and maybe when your mother sees me dressed like a white man she won't think I'm suck a terror. I certainly did look like a day laborer out o .a job the afternoon I landed on the fr porch." "I know," said Isabelle as she laugh- ed heartily and Laid down the book. "It must have been so funny. Moth- er's terribly proper, you know." nd he Mute. times Wint. ike a first ite." ok at his g. I noel little oiug !tion y he just 'ays atal. eed and ater in is ll a still You for to did he to wet t'011 cep our fay ird lop 011- an nd 111. as or lis 0. to ke ff ly to P- or k- le nt h. it k r- e d t-. e e Days went on nee tills, and M Beal was gradually won over to enemy's camp. Every one who kn Wint Miller loved him—loved him d spite his careless, hapless ways, for h kindly spirit and other things, b mostly because he was he. In the da that followed he had many nurses, all the family took turns wheeling hi across the roots so that he might ba in the sunlight, but his happiest hou were when Isabelle was in charge. One afternoon as she patted the p lows at the back of his chair and le a glass of milk at his elbow he caug the hand that had brought so man comforts to hint during his illness. "Won't you stay a little longer, Mb Nightingale?" he pleaded as he hel tightly to the hand. "I'm so lonely 1 the twilight. Wait until Jack come He's due in a few minutes now if tis train isn't late—please," "You old silly," said Isabelle as sh sat on the window ledge with th shadows encircling her. "I wish you knew more about me, said Mut. "I wish you would as some of the fellows if I'm not a deceit sort. You see, I've something to say t you, but I can't until you know m better. It would be like taking an un fair advantage." "Oh, but I know all about you al ready," she said gayly, "Jack and talk about you all the time." He reached out and pulled her a lit tie closer. "I'm a clumsy old thing, as Jack al- ways says, but there's nothing very had about me, and I don't play this sick trick very ofteu. You wouldn't care for a life job of nursing, would you?" He was holding the hand very tightly now as she looked up at him and said coyly: "Ask me, why don't you?" His arms were not very strong as yet, but both of them went around the girl as he drew her to his lips. "Sweetheart," he whispered. "Well, I'll be hanged, What Moller, uone of that," sang out Jack as he stood in the (loorway, grip in hand, as he herd hurried from the train. "1 brought you Clown here to fish, not to teal all the preserves on the family ,l::ntation." "Yes, Jack," said Wint as fie reached out one free baud. "You brought me down to fish, and I'm the champion, for here in my arms is the catch of the season, the best ever." rs. the ew Is ut ut ys as m sk rs 11- ft ht v s8 d n s. e e e k e e I Saving the Bait. "Fishing,^' said a man who lives near us. "Why, I went fishing in Scotland and caught the biggest string of eels you can imagine. "There is the tandem eel that you have all heard of. When they go down or up the stream from their quarters for the winter or summer they go in single tile, one behind the other, like the primeval man. They leave exact- ly six Inches of space between their noses and the tall of the eel in front. When an eel sees that the fellow ahead is lengthening this space, he spring's forward and, seizing the tall of the of- fender in his mouth, pulls him back into place. I dropped my hook down right In front of a string of tandem eels, and the bait was accepted, and I jerked out the eel. The one behind, seeing that the fellow ahead was run- ning away, obeyed his instructions and seized his tail to pull him back, and so did the one behind, and so on to the last one, and I pulled them out band over hand till I had a great mass of slippery eels about me."—Strand Mag- azine. Our First War Vessels. The outbreak of the Revolutionary war found the patriots without a navy. Congress had to create one. Four mer- chantmen were first purchased, hastily equipped with guns and sent to sea as cruisers, but their defects as war Wes- sels soon became so apparent that con- gress determined at once to set about the building of a navy. On Oct. 3, 1775, congress ordered two cruisers built, and on Dec. 13 the order was in- creased to five thirty-two gun ships, fire twenty-eight gun ships and three twenty-four gun ships. They were to be ready for the sea by the following April. The names given to the thirteen vessels were Boston, Congress, Effing- ham, Delaware, Hancock, Montgomery, Providence, Raleigh, Trumbull, Vir- ginia, Warren, Washington and Ran- dolph. These were the first war ves- sels constructed in the United States. The first commander in chief was Eze- kiel Hopkins of Rhode Island, a young brother of Congressman Stephen Hop- kins. He was appointed to this high office on Dec. 22, 1775. Dickens and Thackeray. In Mr. Layard's book, "A Great l'unch Editor," is given Sbirley Brooks' remetnbrance of Thackeray: "What delightful English he wrote! He knew this and was proud and said that Dickens might be a great moral- ist, but that he was the best gramma- rian." Now, the curious thing, ob- serves the London Chronicle, is that Thackeray was a very shaky gramma- rian and that the pages of "Penden- nis" abound in weak collocations and constructions, whereas the self edu- cated Dickens was an almost infallible grammarian. Not in his work shall we find the unrelated and irresponsible "and which" or the split infinitive or anything of the kind. The vulgarism of "aggravate" for "irritate," very com- mon with him, but by no means pe- culiar to him, was nearly his only verbal crime. Seemed Incomprehensible. Mrs. Somer—What delicately con- structed things these big steamships are! Mr. Somer— Why do you say that? Mrs. Somer—Just think of the breaking of a screw disabling the whole ship.—Philadelphia North Amer- ican. Poor Jones! Missionary—Can you give me any information about Deacon Jones, who labored among your people three years ago? Cannibal—Well, the last I heard about him he had gone Into consump- tion.—Judge, A Spanish proverb declares that "a papelitos (a paper cigar), a glass of clear water and a kiss from a pretty girt will sustain a man for a whole d a t Y. DUPLEX ELEVATORS. New System Permit* Express and Local Cars to Run In Same Shaft. An invention which, it Is asserted, will revolutionize elevator service in skyscraper buildings, causlug a saving of space worth from $50,000 to $250,- 000 a year In augmented rents and doubling the efficiency of the average elevator plant, will be installed soon by Architect Jarvis Hunt in several of the largest office structures in Chicago and New York. The key to the invention is the oper- ation of two elevators in one shaft says the New York Herald, With the practical devices to be used as equip- ments for the cars the running of two elevators In one shaft appears to be just/as sate as the running of one ele- vator car at present in the great sky- scraper buildings of the world's most progressive eines. "We will take, for example, a build - lug of twenty stories," said Mr, hunt. In expiate' his invention. "The ex- press els • Is nt the first floor:load. lug; the ',oil elevator directly under- neath It in the basement, not loaded. As soon as the express or upper eleva- tor is loaded it leaves and makes its first stop at the tenth story. Mean- while as soon as the express elevator has (left the first floor the elevator from the basement comes up to the first floor and is loaded, and it leaves the first floor at the same time the ex- press elevator leaves the tenth. Now they both travel up ten floors and serve locally; then both travel down ten floors, serving locally. The posi- tions then are express elevator at tenth floor, local at first. While the express elevator is descending from the tenth floor to the first the local elevator un- loads at the first floor and drops into the basement; then the express eleva- tor unloads at the first. and the same process Is repeated. . "The upper elevator is newer delay- sd. The lower elevator Is only delayed while the upper elevator is loading o► unloading, which In a two minute ,chedule would be about fourteen sec- onds." PURE AIR A NECESSITY. Simple Test With a Lamp Shows Dan- ger of Poor Ventilation. The oxygen of the air is ns much fuel to the flame as the oil in the lamp, and pure air is as necessary a fodi, for the body ns the foal eaten. The fact that lack of oxygen preportionately ef- fects both to the same degree has led Professor F. H. King of the University of 'Wisconsin to conduct a simple ex - pertinent with n gntvanized iron box and an oil lamp to show bow poorly the flame burns in a badly ventilated chs m Ler. The box was provided with circular windows which could be opened to any HOW LACK OF OXYGEN AFFECTS FLAME. degree welshed. With all windows open and the ventilator in place the lamp burned steadily at the normal size shown by the line marked No. 1. As gradually the ventilation was shut off and the movement of air stopped the flame began to dim until it had the dimension shown by No. 4. With screens placed on all the windows only oxygen enough found its way Into the box to barely keep the flame alight, as shown by No. 5. "Too few people realize the fact that the volume of air we breathe each day outweighs twofold the combined weight of • dry and liquid foods we co ume, -aye Professor King. Thread From Paper. Reference has been made to the manufacture of paper ynru and paper clothing in Germany. Now those Inde- fatigable people are making thread from the same material, The thread is reported to be similar in texture to cotton or silk and possessing great strength. No details of the methal of production are vouchsafed, but the thread is said to be suitable for a va- riety of purposes, being impervious to damp and noninflammable. it is claim- ed that the thread can be made at a cost of 90 per cent below that of linen and some 60 per cent less than that of cotton. As will be seen, this would make the manufacture of paper thread very profitable if it could be brought into general use. Protection For Miners. Workers in certain mines, as well as in glass and mirror factories, are sub- ject to injurious effects from the in- halation of mercury vapors. An Ital. Ian savant, Signor Tarugl, believes that the property of aluminium to absorb mercuric vapors may be utilized for protection agains this anger, and he has devised for the rpose a mask of aluminium wire to be worn over the face. Ills idea is that the air breathed will be freed from the injurious vapors through their absorption by the alu- minium. Readings Pig's Tail. "Don't buy that pig," said the older botcher hastily. "Why not?" asked the younger man. "Look at his tall," was the reply, "See how loose it hangs, like the tail of a rat. That Is a sign that the'anl- mal is in bad health. "You can rend a pig's condition by its tail. The tighter it is curled the litter is the pig. And when the tall hangs straight, as this one does, the pig ought to take to his bed and setnd for the veterinary." — New Orleans Times -Democrat Cute Kid. "But, Willie," said the bad boy's mother, "didn't your conscience tell you you were doing wrong?" "Yee'm," replied Willie, "but, you know, you told me not to believe ev- erything I hear."—Houston Post. H. Always Remembered, A smile lurked at the corners of Mrs. Lombard's mouth as she Itetened to the plaint of the school friend whom she had not seen for more than ten years. "I'm afraid, dear," she said, "you'll have to reconstruct some of your plans. You see,'I married a for- getful man too." "Why, you told me not ten minutes ago that your husband had never yet forgotten your birthday or your wed- ding anniversary," cried her friend, "and you told me you'd been married nearly eleven years! That's ever since the year after father took us all abroad," "Yes" said Mrs. Lombard demurely, "I have. That's a long time, isn't it? But, you see, one thing was in my ta- vor—I was born on the Fourth of July. Mr. Lombard couldn't very well forget the national holiday. And u soon as I'd found out how forgetful he was I decided to be married on an- other holiday. "I suppose as you were abroad you didn't realize that the date of my wed- ding was unusual—people aren't often married on the 22d of February, I think. But, you see, by a little ju- dicious planning I've been saved the necessity of reminding him about our anniversary,"—Youth's Companion. Sweetly Thoughtful. The De Jones back lawn was a lawn in name only. It was really an arld desert—bald, so to speak—and in dry weather 11 was always as dusty u a motor track. To the astonishment of Mrs. De Smythe, who lived next door, she one day saw her devoted husband turning the garden hose upon the De Jones' "lawn." "Well, I never!" she exclaimed. "i'm sure I wouldn't trouble to lay the dust in the De Jones' back yard. John, es- pecially as they are such n hateful lot of gossips. Small thanks you'll get for your trouble anyway." Hubby turned to his better halt with a smile which told of mixed pleasure and vindictiveness, "That's all right, my dear. Tbetr darling little Fido was washed snow white this morning. Now he's out there rolling about like a barrel and rubbing the mud well Into his fleecy cont. Trust your husband, my sweet, for real. unadulterated thoughtful. tress!"—London Scraps. Women and "Sport." When a big shoot takes place In the coverts near one of our country houses the occasion is made a sort of society gathering. The ladles of the house party grace it with their presence, and other ladles of the neighborhood are glad to be allowed the honor of such company. Thus a large and fashion- able party assembles, and while each beat is in progress the girls and wom- en try to look on unmoved while a wounded hare kicks and squeals upon the ground for minutes which seem in- terminable to the sensitive onlooker until the beat Is over and the dogs are loosed to finish off the cripples. And, though the hare's piteous shrieking makes Its case seem the worst, the mere mbling over and over of a wound bird Is a shocking eight to see as he time paries and no one goes forwa to release It of its' life.—Lon- don Mall. Dodging Thirteen. "When I lived in New York," writes a former New' Yorker from Berlin, "there was a house near Central park which should have borne the number 13, but because of the superstition of the occupant permission was secured to place the number Ila or 15a over the door. I spoke of the circumstance a few days ago and learned that the thirteen superstition was more clearly marked here. In the instance men- tioned by me an individual was con- cerned. Here it was the most impor- tant corporation in Wiesbaden, There is no No. 13 bathroom in any of the bathhouses, no No. 13 room in any ho- tel and no No. 13 place at any table d'bote. At Langeiischwalbach the baths, under government control, also have bath cells No. 12a where they should be numbered 13."—New York Tribune, A Worthy Antagonist "Did. you visit any of the old caves when you were up in Scotland?" Jor- kins was asked by a friend. "Yes," replied Jorkina reminiscently, Mnd, by gum. we bad to forcibly pull arla out of one cave." "Good gracious! She was fascinated by its beauty, I suppose." "No. it wasn't beauty. You see, there is a wonderful echo In the cave, and Maria couldn't bear to think of the echo baying the last word."—Liverpool Mercury. For Poetical Reasons. "Perchance," culled the amiable wid- ow, "come here!" The little lapdog trotted meekly up. "Surely that Is n strange name for a dogr' exclaimed the gentleman visitor. "What made you pante him Per- chance?" "I am so fond of poetry!" explained the lady lucidly, "Madam. forgive ute. but 1 fail to see the applicability." "Why. silly man." exclaimed the merry widow. "1 named 1t atter By- ron's dog! Dunt you reuieniber where he says. 'Perchance my dog will howl?'" What He Knew. Master—if your friend were to bor- row 12 shiblhtgc froth you, agreeing to pay 1 sblllit;g n mouth, how much would he owe at the enol of the year? Pupil—Twelve rid Mugs. You don't tbnow the elements of arithmetic," "But I know •ny friend."—London Scraps. Got the Cart Before the Horse, Bleb Uncle John—Ah, is this one of your children? Agitated Mother—Yes, Uncle John, that's our tittle Johnnie. Kiss your uncle, dear, and then go and wash your face.—Cleveland Plain Dealer, A Distinction With a Differenom. Editor—You see, a story has to be just so to get In our magazine, Author —Well, wbat'e the matter with this one of mine? Editor—It's only sows— Puck', A FEAT IN PHOTOGRAPHY. Daring Descent to Get a View of an Osprey's Neat. Now commenced my work, and I de- scended on my rope to terrace after terrace, forcing my way through thick rows of prickly pear, a most painful operation. And now we found that there was nobody below to signal us where the nest fay. The inevitable re- sult was that after descending more than 100 feet 1 had to signal to be hauled up again, elven)* through the Wieldy pear. Agabn did t descend, and again did 1 fall to find the nest Oa the third occasion I reached a re- cess in the great cliff, whence, after unbending my rope and securing it to a bush for obvious mesons, 1 made a cant along a ledge to the south and reached n point which I Identified as being not far from the nest as seen from below. So 1 retraced my steps and, regaining my rope, was hauled up for a third time. During this op- eration I passed a ledge where a pere- grine falcon was nesting. The old female swept close around with shrill cries and eventually alighted ou the sandy shelf of rock within a few feet of me and, with outspread wings and every feather standing on end, low- ered her head and screamed furiously. I have no doubt I was close to her young, but 1 had more serious work in band, and so I left her alone. I now made my fourth and last descent and found myself immediate- ly o-er the nest, but before 1 could go down to it the party handling the rope had to work their way down toward me, since the rope was too short. Fi- nally 1 reached the neat, au euormous mass of big sticks measuring more than five feet across and doubtless the result of many years' work, In it were two eggs much incubated, By stand - tag on a ledge close to the nest and pressing the camera between my body and the face of the slid" I was able to take some long time ezpoeutes with fairly good results- It was near sun- set, and the cliff Was !n deep shadow, which did not facilitate my task. Be- tween the ahaly nature of the cliff, the slippery terraces covered with loose soil and stones 111nr1 the detestable prickly pears 1 never had a more un- pleasant or arduous task on a cliff be- fore. But I have lived to endure worse experiences, although not so painfully protracted as were these. My very curt entry in my diary sum- marises the whole job thug; "Bad shale cliffs, vertical and dangeroms. Height over sea, 180 feet, Top of cliff, 310 feet. The worst bit of rope work I ever did." With regard to the prickly pears, It was many months before the last of the poisonous spines 1 had collected in various parte of my itody consented to come out, and then only after first fes- tering.—London Saturday Review, Disinterested Profusion/1i Advice. "Bring me that beefsteak potpie"— rYassah," said the dining ear waiter, listening near by. "And bring me some of there French peu"— "Yassab; but boar, maybe you all don't know dey's French peas fn dat pie." "No, I didn't Thanks, George, And —ah—and—ah, then bring me some po- tatoes," "Yassah, boss; but maybe you all didn't know dey's Wein, too, in dat pie," "No, I didn't, Thanks again, George. It's mighty nice of you to keep me from buying a lot of stuff I wouldn't, want." "Yasuh, Ab reckon it's mahty nice o' me t' do dat, boss. Ah's seen so many, m -a -n -y people—nice gee metre, lak you all—waste money to' veg'tables dat might jus' as well 'a' been handed over to th' watteh, Yaisaah, Ah sho' has."—Judge. Bacteria in Sutter. 'Bacteriologists have shown us that ordinary butter is swarming with germs," declares Good Health. "A sin- gle teaspoonful of milk generally con- tains from 2,000,000 to 10,000,000 germs. The number may even be much larger than this. In the removal of cream from the milk the germs are taken with it, and in the process of churning the germs are collected with the fat, so In the butter we have the concentration of a large part of the germs contained in the milk from which the butter was derived. So in a pound of butter de- rived from twenty pints of milk the number of bacteria must be almost be- yond estimate. A brief computation will show that the number of bacteria contained in a pound of butter might easily reach the enormous sum of five to ten billions." ,C A Touch of Vanity. On Nov. 26—St. Catherine's day— French girls who have passed tbetr twenty-fifth birthday and are unmar- ried wear a little cap made of fine mus- lin, the rymbol of maldhood- As the day approaches the millinery shops *bow these caps in great quantities, and their manufacture by young girls ie always accompanied by jokes at the expense of old melds; but, strange to relate, these caps, because they are be- coming to all, are worn on St Cather- ine's day by young girls as well as by old maids. Where It Doesn't Apply. "Slow and sure," remarked the man with the quotation habit, "is a good motto." "But." protested the thoughtful thinker, "there is one tlitng that can never be slow and sure." "What's that?" queried the quotation dispenser. "A watch," replied the t t.—Kansas City Independent Lack Right Qualittaa., Mrs. Hix—Mrs. June Strikes me as being entirely too maseullne for a wo- a tan. Mrs, Dix—Yes, Indeed, Wby, every time she has an ache or pain she makes as much Cuss about it as a man would.—Smith's Weekly. Retrenching. "I tell you, they are retrenching," "But they stilt have their auto." "Which they run well within the speed limit Ball"—Louisville Courier - Journal. LEE AND M'CLELLAN. An Incident of the First Meeting of • the Two Soldiers, The first meeting between General George B. McClellan and General Rob- ert .Lee hlu pe country.'Mexico during the war was a lieutenant of engirs, McClellan was a major on the staff of (General Winfield Scott. One day McClellan was wa►klug across a geld when he saw feneral Scott and his staff approaching on horseback. As they drew near Ma- jor Lee reined up his horse and asked the lieutenant if he did not know that be was disobeying orders. Ills tone was sharp and angry. McClellan answered that he was not aware of any disobedience and asked for an ex- planation. Lee replied that all oUicers had been told to remain In their quar- ters, awaiting orders, and asked for the lieutenant's name. McClellan gave his name and said that no order of that kind had reached him. But Lee In a peremptory tone ordered him to go to his quarters and remain there. Then he rode off and rejoined General Scott and the staff, who had not stopped. McClellan went to his quarters, as he had been directed to do, but was quite indignant at the way in which Lee had treated him, for he had not knowingly committed a breach of discipline. He had just finished telling his broth- er officers the incident when be wait informed that an officer was outside the tent asklug for him. On going out be was much surprised to see Major Lee, who saluted bim with respell, "Lieutenant McClellan," the major said, "I am afraid that I was not cour- teous in my manner to you, a little while ago, and 1 hare called to apol- ogize." "I assured him that it was all right," said General McClellan In telling the story, "and he rode off after making a low bow, leaving me 1n admiration of a superior officer who so promptly and generously repaired an error."— Chicago News. • AN AERIAL HORROR. The Very Dreadful Thing That Stroh - Schneider Did, A group of aeronauts were tatting aeronautics. "Did you ever hear of Strohschnel- der?' said a German, "He did a dread- ful thing once. I'll tell you about it "Strohschneider appeared in a cer- tain village and advertised 'that he would take the landlord of the village inn up with him on a trapeze hanging from the car of his balloon, "Though the landlord's wife made a kick and the authorities, upholding her, forbade the man to accompany Strohschnelder, the landlord eat In state on the trapeze beside the famous aeronaut when the ascension began. "But those nearest to him noticed that he was paler than a ghost and that his arm was thrown around Stroh• schnelder's neck as if In terror. And, noting these things, the people nodded ominously to one another, "Up and up went the balloon, and now a murmur of horror arose among the multitude. The aeronaut and the landlord were quarreling; they were fighting. High up there in the clouds, perched on the swaying trapeze, they struggled, thumped, kicked. "Suddenly the aeronaut, in a mad burst of rage, seized the landlord by the throat, thrust him backward and flung him into space- Down the poor fellow dropped like a stone, turning over and ower. He alighted on his head. "The people, mad with horror and rage, rushed to the spot. And there, to their amazement, stood the landlord, laughing heartily. The figure that had fallen was a manikin dressed up in his clothes. "And this," the speaker concluded, "is the only practical joke that has ever been played from a balloon,"— New Orleans Times -Democrat He who changes the sports is se- cretly changing the manners of the young.—Plato. Illustration Showing Mixed FarmingScenela WESTERN CANADA Some of the choicest landsfor grain growlaa', stock raising and mixed farming in the new dfs- trlcts of Saskatchewan anti Alberta have re - et -tidy been Opened for Settlement under the Revised Homestead Regulations Ittttry may now be made by proxy (on certain conditions), by the father, mother, son, daughter, brother or sister of an Intending homesteader, Taoucaads o! homesteads of 160 acres each are thus now eactly obtainable In these great grain - growing, stock -raising and mixed farming sec. Hens. There you trill find healthful climate, good neighbors, churches for family worship, schools for your children, good laws, splendid crops, and railroads convenient to market. Entry fee in each case la110.W. For pamphlet, "Last Best West." particulars an to rates, routes, fest time to go and where to locate, apply t0 E. T. HOLMES 313Jackson Street, St. Paul, Minn. Canadian Government Agent No matter from what source they came, if you have a skirt, jacket, a dainty waist, piece of lace, em- broidery or linen, or some other article of value, we can clean it for you, removing the spot or stain entirely. The cost is a mere trifle and you again have the use of the article you thought you could no longer use. to feraetles Smoak, free. Seers - 85eA pJS ea ert/yra of M et stars Gross Br Perlis of Crimeilne. The dangers of the historic crinoline are illustrated by a story told by Lady Dorothy Nevill in her "Reminiscences." Going too near fisc fireplace, her volts - inhume skirt caught fire, and in an instant she was in a blaze. There were no men present, and the women could not help her, because it they had gone near enough to be of use their own skirts would have been ignited. Fortunately Lady Dorothy had suffi- cient presence of mind to roll herself in the hearth rug and thus subdue the flames. A Judge of Land. Proud Father—Welcome back to the old farm, my boy. So you got through college all rfe. F'armer's Son—Yes, father, Proud Father—Ye know, I told ye to study up chemistry and things, so you'd know best what to do with different kinds of land. What do you think of that flat medder there, for in- stance? Farmer's Son—Cracky, what a place for a ball game!—Sanaa Qtly Independent Pity the Poor Welf. "Why is It," asked the fox, "that you always look so gaunt?" "Oh," replied the wolf, 'ICs all due to the business I'm in, I always have to keep away from the door until there's nothing left in the house to flet:."—Catholic Standard and Times. Cure Your Kidneys. Do Not Endanger Life When a Haat- loge Oitiaen Shows Ton the Cure. Why will people continue to suffer the agonies of kidney complaint, backache, urinary disorders, lameness, headaches, languor„why allow themselves to become chronic invalids, when a certain cure Is offered them? Doan's Kldnt'y Pills is the remedy to Use. because it gives to the kidneys the help they need to perform their work. If you have say, even one of the ayes!). toms of kidney diseases, cure yourself now, before diabetes, dropsy, or Bright's disease sets in. itead this Basting' testimony: William C. King. west Fifth Street, Hastings, Miun., says, "My kidney trouble dates back about four years ago. At that time I worked very hard, and this has served to weaken my kidneys. At times l suffered from dizzy spells which would eome on me very suddenly, and would be so severe that I was hardly able to keep my balance. My kidneys were In a much disordered condition, the secretions being too frequent in action, but scanty and generally attended with a scalding sensation. My wife has used Doau's Kidney Pills with good results for similar complaints, and seeing the benefit she has derived from their use i decided to try them and procured a box at F. W. Finch's drug store. I found Doane Kidney Pills to be an excellent remedy anti do not hesitate to recommend them.” For sale by all dealers. Price 50 cents. Fustsr-5lilburn Co., Buffalo, N.. Y.. sole agents for the United States, Remember the name—Doan'e—and take no other. ESTATE OF DECEDENT. State of Minnesota, oounty of Dakota.—es. la prohate court. In the matter of the estate of Samuel Harsh, decedent, The state of Minnesota to Sarah Jane Harsh, Samuel A. Harsh, Nettie Harsh. John W. Cary, Walter E. Cary, and all persons interested In the anal account and dis- tribution of the estate of said decedent: The representatihaving-aledvtnthithe court bit anaabove l account of the adminietratlou of the estate of raid decedent, together with his petlt.on pro bng for the adjustment and allowance of said anal account and for distribution of the residue of said resew to the persons thereunto entitled. There- fore, you, and each of you, are hereby cited and required to show cause, if any you have, before this court, at the probate court room In the courthouse. In the city of Hastings, In the counSia day of Februaof ry. state 908, at Mten o'clock an. the , why said petition should not be granted. %(fitnss, Lha udge of said court, and the seal of said court. this 10th day of JaquaryJ,1808. Ifk'tonveSxar.) THOS. P. MORAN, 18Probate Judge. 1k . HJw DsKav, Attorney for Petitioner, ESTATE OF DECEDENT. State of Minnesota, county of Dakota --aa. l■ prob*te urt. to she matter of the estate of Harriet ltarbaraa, deoedent The state of Minnesota to Alma Bran- deabcurger, Julia Barba -as, and *1l per- sons interested to a allowance and probate of the will of said lent. The peti- tion of Julia Barbaro bel duly Sled to this court, representing that Harriet Bae• bane, then a resident of the /comity et Dakota, state of Mlon:mote, died on the lgf.b daof Decemtb,er, a. d. 1907, leaving a last will teswith mid petitiowhich , andpprayy(ng this lit •Irunrnt be allowed as the last wtll and testa- ment of said decedent, and that letters of administration with the will annexed of the estate of said deceased be Issued thereon to her. Now, therefore, you, and each of you, are hereby cited and required to show cause, if any you here. before this court, at the .pprobate court roams In the courthouse, in Hastings, oosnty of Dakota, state or Minnesota, ontbe 6th day of February, 1908, at ten o'clock a, m., why the prayer of said petition should sot be granted, 11 funs,, the Honorable Tha, P. Moran, lodge 0r said court, and the seal of said court, this 9th day of January, 1908. !those Ssu b THOS. P. MORAN, ie9w• Judge of Probate, W. H. OItu*T, Attorney for Petitioner, ESTATE OF DECEDENT. ._ State of Minnesota, oolmoty of Dakota,—es. In probate 00511, ie the matter of the estate of Walter R. Cary, decedent. Letters of admintstration this day having been graned fatA. ofhadintoo prreobyd it sidadmadministrator that there aro no debts against said estate. it is ordered that the time within which all creditors of the above named decedent may present claim. against his estate to this court, be. and the same hereby Is. limited to three months from and after the date hereof: and that Tuesday, the Ixth day of May, 1908, at ten o'clock a. m., to the probate court room, at the oonrthouse at Hastings, in said county, be, and the same hereby is axed and appointed as the time and place for hearing upon and the es- atntnatlon.Adjustment, end allowance of ascii oatfnt'al—shall be presented within the time ar6i'ea*id . int uoUoe hereof be Riven by the publication of Ibis order In The Hastings Gazette as provld• ed by law. i1sted January 10th, 1908. Iry the court THO8. P. MORAN, (L. S) 1a -8w Judge of Probate. N. H. D*Kar, Attorney for Representative. tee awe W llltAll ! O'j. 1